I should say up front that my (male) postdoc Advisor has beeen nothing but supportive of both the general notion that the postdoc is a good time to have children, and the specific instantiation, that Dr Hyde and I are planning for IVF. I'm really grateful that he's so awesome.
Still, talking with him is distinctly different than talking with my (female) GradAdvisor.
Scene: Most lab members absent on various trips etc. Advisor pulls up a chair near me.
Advisor: So, Jekyll, how is your health?
Jekyll: It's fine...We're planning on trying a cycle of IVF in November.
Advisor: How does that work, exactly?
Jekyll: Well, I'll have daily shots of hormones to increase egg production. Then they extract the eggs from me, inject one of Dr Hyde's sperm into each egg, wait a couple of days, and put them back in.
Advisor: Wow, I didn't realize it was so involved. Tell me, how do they get the eggs out? Is it with a needle? [gestures at abdomen]
Jekyll: Erm, no, they go in vaginally.
Advisor: [brightening] Oh, so at least it's not invasive.
Jekyll: ....
Confidential to my male readers: Lying back half-naked with your legs in the air, having a guy poke around in your ladyparts, is a truly context-dependent activity.
15 years ago
10 comments:
invasive ... thanks, that made me laugh :)
i've been reading your blog for a while, and i enjoy your stories. i hope that things go well for you in nov!
Your sweet advisor is totally clueless- does he not have a wife? You would think a wife would have already made him well-aware of the trials and tribulations of stirrups and speculums.
wow. I guess he thought the needle only works through the abdomen and not when you go in "the other 'normal' way".
It must be nice to be so clueless. Granted though, I'm sure he tried to show support and just got a little nervous when you actually talked about it?!
I wish you all the best in November!! Godd luck!
*facepalm*
Not only clueless in that any action down there is invasion (is he not intimately familiar with the sigmoidoscope, rigid or flexible?) but it's hard to imagine he doesn't know people closely who have gone through fertility treatments.
We know so many people who have gone through it that it's almost more surprising when a couple has success naturally.
He has not only a wife but also a baby. I think this was his way of saying it was nice that they don't have to stick a needle in my belly, and it just came out oddly. Still, it was hard to know how to respond. Odd enough already to be talking with my Advisor about my vagina.
I opted for, "Well, there are no new holes added, at least," and he seemed to get the point.
That's hilarious.
"context-dependent" indeed.
Your advisor might just have an irrational needle-phobia. Still- impressive missing the point.
At times like these I like to make a joke about the regular trips to the proctologist awaiting all aging XYs...that pretty much puts things in perspective.
Context dependent! Indeed!
Although, I have to tell ya DJMH, once you are actually sperminated and you're going in for weekly visits you're going to stop caring what's in your vagina or who's putting it there, as long as its warm.
The Isis family will keep the Hyde family in their prayers and wish you the best success.
I opted for, "Well, there are no new holes added, at least," and he seemed to get the point.
I loved your response!
From my childish prospective I'd much rather have a needle punched through my abdomen than up my hooha.
You must of course tell this story of conception every time future mini jekyll he/she complains about some misfortune that's befallen them.
NEEDLE up VAGINA, for the instawin.
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